beast nor a burden

And by chance (or was it some cosmic design!?) I got my hands on a few books written by a master, from a shop, at a place I have never been to earlier. Reading them I further realized certain implications of my goddess dream. Through out my dream there was an undercurrent of eroticism. Sex and Sexuality. What a beast and what a burden.

I realized that in my dream there was a strong desire, a desire to be intimate in the dream.

I always did wonder why we humans are so scared of sex and our sexuality. Why do we repress feeling about something which is so godly? Why do we hide the act of sex?

The master had a few words to say on this. At the time of your orgasm, you are in total emptiness, where there is no “I” and there is no ego. He goes on to talk a lot around this point.

And what are my thoughts? There are no thoughts, no feelings, just a direct and deep connection to oneness during that instant of time when you experience an orgasm.

The master goes on to talk of the high price you pay to experience this emptiness, the state of Samadhi. The price he talks of is the loss of your vital energy at the time of the orgasm.

If you were given a chance to achieve the same state of Samadhi without going through the rituals of courting, sex and loss of vital energy, would you take it?

I guess the universal answer would be a maybe? And the route to achieve this state of samadhi? Mediation! With mediation you can achieve the same state of emptiness and no ego, anytime you want to, and on your own.

The oneness which you achieve with your partner during the act of sex is unbelievable, your egos have disappeared, there is no “I” and there are no walls between the two of you.

There is only emptiness and silence! Into this emptiness pours in love and joy.

It ain’t no beast, nor ain’t a burden. sex ain't no more a high priority thought. and funny that with such a tiny mind shift, suddenly life has new meaning now. i am seeing people in a totally different shade of blue.

was sex and erotica really something which was driving me till a few weeks back? man, so much time has been wasted on this. my relationship with naina, tania and other people i know have moved to a different level, where there is a constant feeling of love.

but the funny part of this growth/realisation of mine is that, i seem to be operating at a plane where not many people are operating or maybe i have not met them yet or maybe i still need to un-fuckup myself more before i can be with the real people.

i have a strong feeling the world is still looking at me as if i am thinking with my balls.

the bliss ,love and esctacy is what is driving a me.

(a silent thank you to my guru who has put me onto the path that i am travelling now.)